Fatherhood Forever has issued a new brochure for men that are suffering from the pain of a past abortion. Click here for access. Share it with everyone you know.

Posted by Mary Comm at 01:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

In Our Midst's web site is in the process of being renovated. Look for the new and improved site in the next week or so. I think it's going to be a hit! :)

Along those same lines, we are looking for someone with programming and creative design skills that could help us with ongoing updates and changes to the web site. It would be helpful if they also "have a heart" for abortion recovery ministry. If you or someone you know fits this description, please contact us by email at staff@inourmidst.com.

Posted by Mary Comm at 12:43 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

There's an incredible web site called PostSecrets.com that has done an amazing job of allowing people a way to share their deepest, darkest secrets with the world in an anonymous and non-threatening way. I would invite everyone to take a look at this site. [Caution: Some of the postcards on PostSecrets.com are quite graphic in nature.]

In light of the significance and poignance of the PostSecret site, I would like to invite you to send your abortion secrets to us. We will post your secret in the same way, only your "audience" will be the pastors, ministry leaders, and abortion recovery folks that visit In Our Midst.

If you have an abortion secret or an abortion regret, I invite you to share that with us and those who visit our site either via email or by sending a post card to:

In Our Midst Ministries, Inc.
P.O. Box 30621
Edmond, OK 73003

Whether it is the first time or the hundredth time, share your secret or regret with us so we may share them with others in order to help non-post-abortive people understand how abortion has affected you.

Posted by Mary Comm at 02:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

As we have begun this work of equipping churches to minister to the post-abortive we have encountered some wonderful people…. People who understand the need for abortion recovery in the Church. People who are ready and willing to meet this hurting population where they are with the love of Christ and for His glory. These people, these churches have blessed us beyond what we could ever imagine!

But there have been a few that have rejected the idea for one reason or another. Either they are literally too busy to take on one more thing, they are too discouraged to think something of this nature would do any good, the job seems entirely too big, or they honestly do not see the need in their congregation. These are the more obvious reasons, but I believe there may be some other less obvious reasons at the root of this rejection. I think one reason may be fear.

When the Church is Afraid
People – even people within the Church -- are sometimes afraid of the word abortion. They are afraid it will polarize their people. They are afraid the topic will turn political. Maybe they are merely afraid they won’t know how to help those hurt by it or that they will be inundated with throngs of abortion-wounded people. Perhaps they’re afraid they won’t be able to put their own feelings aside regarding the issue in order to help them….

Overcoming the Fear
Whatever the case, those of us in ministry need to “get over it!” We have a job to do. Yes, it’s a big job, but God doesn’t call the equipped, right? He equips the called. If there is a shake-up in your congregation, go ahead. Some people need to be shaken out of their comfort zones anyway. And if there are people in your congregation that are pro-choice, they need to know the truth of why abortion is never the right choice. Our job as ministers of the gospel is to tell people the truth based on God’s Word. We don’t have to justify or defend the truth; we merely need to share the truth based on facts and allow the Holy Spirit to work how and where and in whom He will work.

Our priority should always be to please God, not man. We may offend some people in the Church as we discuss the truth about abortion, and as much as we don’t want to do that, neither should we choose to neglect those in our midst that are suffering silently due to a past abortion. Perspective is often a difficult thing to maintain, but the final plumb line must always be: Are we striving to please God in all we do regardless of others that may be displeased?

If abortion is brought out of the closet in your congregation, rest assured you will not be overrun with post-abortive people requiring immediate attention and/or counseling. Yes, some will come, but in a trickle usually. One at a time, little by little. There will not be a stampede during the altar call. It just doesn’t happen that way.

Becoming Informed
When they do come, yes, you need to know how to minister to them – which is what In Our Midst Ministries is all about. If you already know how to counsel others with Scripture – and hopefully you do!—the rest is just basics of understanding who has abortions and why, how abortion affects them, and the areas in which they need healing. And the best part is that you (as the pastor) probably will not be the one they need to walk with them through the healing process. The recovery process works best in small support groups with leaders that have been through the post-abortive healing process themselves.

So what do you, as the pastor need to do? You need to know the truth about abortion – not merely what you’ve heard through society or the media. You need to know why people “choose” abortion and how it affects them emotionally, spiritually, and physically. And you need to know how to create a “safe” environment within your church for those who have been wounded by abortion. “Safe” meaning that your congregation has been adequately informed about the abortion issue so that they have compassion (not condemnation) in their hearts for the abortion-affected. You will find that few people will come forward asking for help for recovery from this issue without first knowing they will be accepted and loved, not judged or gossiped about.

There are several ways you can prepare yourself for post-abortion ministry. One is to read up on the topics here at In Our Midst, in books, and on the Internet. (Use caution, however when surfing the web on this topic.) A second way is to invite us to come to your church to train you and your staff, as well as anyone else from your church or community that is interested in post-abortion ministry. The training can be done in a few hours.

Creating a Safe Atmosphere in Your Church
The next step is to begin creating a safe atmosphere in your church. Many people have misconceptions about abortion, who has them, and why. Your job is to inform your congregation about the truth of abortion. Dispel the wrong beliefs.

Treat abortion as any other sin and admonish your congregation to do the same. Jesus loved sinners. It was for the sinners that He came to earth in human form – to tell them about the Father’s love for them, to model that love for them, and to give His life as a ransom for their (our) sin. We must never forget where we ourselves came from, and each of us came from a life of sin.

Bring the sin of abortion into the light of the cross by the light of the Word of God. Show your congregation how Jesus defended the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11) – a sin punishable by death in those days. Show them how He defended her, shaming her accusers and saving her life before He ever confronted her sin. And even then He did not condemn her. He defended her, He shamed her accusers, then He freed her to go and sin no more. That is our model for dealing with the post-abortive…and how much more for the post-abortive Christians in our midst?

Reaping the Rewards!
God will so bless your church, your ministry, your people if you will answer the call to meet these hurting people at the point of their need. Abortion is a tough topic to grapple, and I won’t lie to you: post-abortion ministry brings with it a fair amount of spiritual warfare. Abortion is the enemy’s territory, one of his pet methods for destroying the people of God and their effectiveness for Christ. To bring post-abortion ministry into your church is to step on his toes. That in itself should be a good reason to pursue it! It is time to take back that territory, to tear down his strongholds on God’s people.

What a joy it is to see God’s people being set free from the pain and condemnation of a past abortion. What a thrill it is to see them go from mourning to dancing! And what a greater reward it is to witness them taking what the enemy meant for evil in their lives and using it to glorify God! That’s what this ministry is all about. Freeing God’s people, defeating the enemy’s hold over them, and watching as they go and do likewise with others similarly wounded.

Why wait another minute? Begin now and watch for God’s blessings. Contact us for more information about how to begin meeting the needs of the post-abortive in your midst. We are here to serve you.

Posted by Mary Comm at 02:23 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Hooray for Progress!
Pornography has finally made it into many evangelical churches – as a ministry, I mean – and it’s about time. How I praise God that those with pornography addictions are finally being given a safe place within the Church to receive compassionate understanding, accountability, and assistance as they seek godly recovery. For too long either the Church didn’t believe or didn’t recognize how pervasive pornography addiction was within the Church. For a growing number of churches this is no longer the case, and I for one say, hallelujah!

More Progress Needed: Abortion Recovery in the Church
At the same time my heart breaks for the countless Christians suffering silently within the Church because of a past abortion experience. Statistics now report that at current rates at least one in three women will have at least one abortion by the age of 45. One in three. But as we know, abortion isn’t merely a women’s issue. It’s not merely about the baby and it’s not merely a women’s issue. A woman doesn’t get pregnant alone, and it is not her life alone that is affected when she aborts. No, abortion affects everyone it touches – from the grandparents to the children those post-abortive parents have years later, to the medical community…and everyone in between.

Just as abortion isn’t a baby or woman’s issue, it isn’t the “world’s” problem. Jesus said the Church is to be the spiritual hospital for all broken and wounded people. That includes those that have backslidden (there’s a term that takes me back a few years!) as well as those affected by addictions – drugs, alcohol, pornography – and yes, even those that have been wounded by abortion.

Worn Out, Used Up, Uninformed…Afraid
Yet there are still too many pastors that, due to compassion fatigue, because they don’t understand the issue, because of fear of how their congregation will respond, or because their ministry “plate” is already full, they feel they can’t possibly take on another ministry. When did Jesus ever instruct us to only meet the needs of those for whom we had time? When did Jesus ever direct us to only minister to those for whom we have a clear understanding of their sin? Of all the people that have ever walked the earth, if anyone was in a position to feel overwhelmed by the needs around Him or to experience compassion fatigue it was Jesus. Of course Jesus knew how to pace Himself. He knew how and when to steal away for a few hours for spiritual rejuvenation with His Father. [And in all fairness, He didn't have a wife and children at home depending on Him as well.] ;) He also knew the importance of training others with whom He could share the workload. And fear, well, there wasn’t a sin that intimidated Him. Why? Because His heart —and His ministry—was for the sinner. It was for the sinners He died. It was for the sinners He lived too. It was for the sinners He loved that He did it all. Not just certain sinners – but all sinners. From every tribe, every tongue, every nation, and every category of sin.

Of the pastors I know personally, I see many similarities of Christ in them, especially when it comes to ministering to those around them. They too see the needs of those in their flocks and want to give their best to help meet those needs. In that sense they are reflecting the heart of Jesus in amazing ways and I have the greatest respect for those pastors. Unfortunately, it's also those pastors that seem to experience the greatest degree of compassion fatigue and feelings of being overwhelmed. And sadly, I do not have an easy solution for that.

Passing By On the Other Side of the Road
Even so, I would challenge every pastor that would say, “That’s a great ministry you have there, but… (fill in the blank),” to examine the Word of God for support for that response. If Jesus were standing here before you right now would you tell Him you don’t have time for the abortion affected? That you’re too overwhelmed to help them? That your ministry “plate” is full? Again, of the pastors I know, that would never be their response. So what is the solution? I wish there was an easy answer to that question. I believe, however, that while recognizing our limits is good, we should never limit God's ability to minister through us. If He has brought this ministry to your awareness, perhaps it is worth pursuing; perhaps it is worth asking Him, "What would You have me do in regard to this ministry opportunity?"

Who should be ministering to the abortion-affected if not the Church? If we don't do it, who will be Jesus to them?

Another example from Scripture comes to mind… It’s the story of the Good Samaritan – and the religious leaders that passed by on the other side of the road, refusing to help the person that had been beaten and robbed. Did they not have time either? I encourage you (pastors and ministry leaders) to not allow the weight of your ministry burden to prevent you from seeking training and resources that could actually help lighten your load overall, even if it is in the "new" area of ministry to the post-abortive.

Contact us to learn how we can help. We are here to serve you.

Posted by Mary Comm at 05:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

There's a name for everything these days. Who knew?

As I have talked with some pastors lately I have gotten similar responses: "Sounds like a great ministry but I've got more ministry work than I can handle right now. I can't possibly think of adding to what I'm already doing." And this after they have agreed that abortion is affecting those around them in often crippling ways. Is there an epidemic of compassion fatigue (CF) among our ministers and pastors? I'm beginning to wonder.

I encountered my own bout of compassion fatigue back in 2000. What was supposed to be a relatively short sabbatical ended in a full-fledged resignation. I called it burnout at the time, but I think compassion fatigue more aptly fits. And now I'm beginning to recognize similar responses in some of the pastors I've spoken with recently. They're dealing with so many people with so many big problems -- marital discord, divorce, depression, addictions, destructive behaviors, eating disorders, cutting, and the list goes on. The trouble is, these issues can often be the red flags signaling a deeper, more complex root problem such as an unresolved abortion experience. And as we know, one must get to the root of the problem before significant progress is accomplished. Sadly, these pastors are not seeing that significant progress and as a result they are experiencing frustration, losing hope, and some are even becoming cynical -- which in turn sometimes prevents them from pursuing the training they need that will enable them to begin making progress with these people for whom abortion is their core issue. And the vicious cycle of CF continues.

CF is a common malady for those in counseling, pastoring, or caretaking roles. Often, for those dealing with broken people, what they end up with is a sense of hopelessness, anger, frustration, etc., especially when their profession is ministry based. Many times those in ministry find it difficult to draw appropriate boundaries between ministry and home life, often giving of themselves until they are physically, emotionally, and spiritually depleted.

I located a couple of good articles on the topic along with some symptoms. Review the symptoms and be on the lookout for them even with your own pastor or church/ministry leaders. If you see the signs of compassion fatigue, the time to act is now. Help them find the help they need. Pray with them and for them. Do what you can to support, encourage, and facilitate their recovery.

Posted by Mary Comm at 12:24 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

This past year has been amazing. It has been such a wild ride! We at In Our Midst are so excited to be participating in this much-needed area of ministry. Just to let you know where we've been, where we are currently, and some of the places we will soon be going, below is our current schedule.

In addition to these we have several other potential events and trainings in the works. If you would like to book In Our Midst to do a training in your area, please contact us at staff@inourmidst.com. We have a limited number of training weekends available for 2006, so don't miss this opportunity to invite us to your church or organization. We are here to serve you for His glory!

Trainings - Completed:

• San Diego, CA: College Area Pregnancy Services: P/A Training - Basic Track
  
• Edmond, OK: Ministries of Jesus: P/A Training - Basic Track: Sept. 12 – 26, 2005
  
• Edmond, OK: HHBC: P/A Training – Basic Track: Sept. 12 – Oct. 3, 2005
  
• Rock Hills, SC: Calvary Baptist Church: Healing the Hurting In Our Midst Conference – Basic Track: Sept. 30 – Oct. 1, 2005
  

Events - Coming Soon:

• Southern Baptist Convention's Annual State Convention, South Carolina - November 14, 2005
• South Carolina Ride 4 Life: Beginning June 9, 2006

No Greater Love Groups:

• Edmond, OK: HHBC: Began October 6, 2005
• Rock Hill, SC: Calvary Baptist Church: Beginning November 1, 2005

Posted by Mary Comm at 10:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The brochures for our No Greater Love post-abortion bible study support groups are now in! To learn more about this ministry opportunity or to receive a brochure, write to us at staff@inourmidst.com.

Posted by Mary Comm at 10:47 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I received an email a few days ago alerting me to the fact that American Girl has linked itself with Girls Inc. Girls Inc. appears on the surface to be a pro-girl organization with many positive goals and ideals. However, on further inspection their true colors are revealed in their support of the pro-choice, pro-homosexual agenda.

I have emailed American Girl about this affiliation , but have not received their reply as of this writing. I will post their response once I receive it. My own daughter loves American Girl's dolls and we have several of their books. I will exercise my own freedom of choice in the future, however, as to where we will shop for our daughter. Bottom line: I will not patronize American Girl if Girls Inc. represents their ideology. Period.

Below is a quote concerning Girls, Inc.'s position on "Reproductive Freedom" that I found at their web site:

Girls Incorporated supports a woman’s freedom of choice, a constitutional right established by the U.S. Supreme Court in 1973 in Roe vs. Wade.

[Click here for the full explanation of what Girls Incorporated supports.]

BTW: This is not a political statement. As the mother of an impressionable daughter, this is completely personal.

Posted by Mary Comm at 02:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

In Our Midst has been invited to the Southern Baptist Convention's statewide pastors conference for South Carolina coming up in November. Over 2,000 pastors will be in attendance! Please pray that God would be preparing the hearts of those pastors to receive the message to be delivered during that conference and that they will be motivated to begin ministering to those in their midst that have been hurt by abortion.

Posted by Mary Comm at 01:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Jesus said:"Do you not remember, when I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many baskets full of broken pieces you picked up?" They said to Him, "Twelve." Mark 8:18b,19 NASB

In Our Midst and SafeHaven Ministries combined efforts this past weekend to bring the first "Helping the Hurting In Our Midst" conference to Calvary Baptist Church in Rock Hill, South Carolina.

It was, I believe, what will be a loaves and fishes experience over the coming weeks and months. We only had about 30 people in attendance, but God touched the lives of those 30 and I believe they will be the five loaves and two fish that God will use to begin multiplying the ministry to which we've been called.

God moved in such amazing ways this past week and weekend.... I am still in awe of what He accomplished.... Following are just a few ways we saw God work:

Anita was confronted by a gentleman at the church while we were setting up for the first session. He was filled with anger and told Anita with much bitterness in his voice that both his daughter and granddaughter had had abortions. However, Anita came alongside him even in his angry state. She told him that we are called to love sinners as Christ would; that we are His hands and feet and heart toward them. She later told me that his demeanor softened after that encounter....

One (non-post-abortive) woman was able to attend only part of the conference having been pulled away by a family situation. After she returned home her mother-in-law came for a visit and confessed that she was post-abortive. Because the non-p/a woman had just been to the conference, she was able to receive that information with acceptance, understanding and compassion.

The pastor took up an offering during one of the sessions which ended up being two dollars more than the bill for the food we served for lunch!

Another woman reported through tears Sunday morning that "Satan had been defeated" in her life as a result of this conference.

Another woman wrote on one of the evaluation forms: "I can't wait to share [what I learned here]with others. Now I feel empowered as a non-abortive female to share with others."

By God's grace and because of His faithfulness, this small group of people learned the truth about abortion . They learned how to compassionately minister to them, and they were challenged to take what they learned back to their churches and communities and to share this truth with others. Already many doors for healing have been opened in people's lives.

It was an exhausting weekend, but it was worth every ounce of energy, work, frustration, expense, inconvenience, and attack of the enemy we encountered. And we were invigorated and energized to continue on in this work for His glory.

Please continue to pray for In Our Midst as our work is only beginning. The fact that we sent invitations to over 550 churches in North and South Carolina and only thirty people showed up confirms just what an uphill battle we have before us. Even so, this is God's ministry and we believe He will continue the good work He has begun in and through us for His glory and on behalf of those in our midst that have been so deeply wounded by abortion.

Many thanks go to all the kind folks at Calvary Baptist Church, Rock Hill, and to the wonderful SafeHaven volunteers that gave of themselves to help bring this conference together. May God bless each of you a thousand-fold for your service to Him and His people this past weekend!

To God be the glory forever and ever, Amen!

Mary Comm
President, In Our Midst Ministries, Inc.

Posted by Mary Comm at 12:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)